I'm feeling mysteriously thinner. I think it's something to do with denim. I haven't been following 'The Plan' and am avoiding Elle and Ray with the flabbiness of my will power and the stretch marks of my excuses (unsightly, born of failure), so it can't be that. Or is it true that 'it's the thought that counts' and I've thought myself thinner just meditating on miso paste and crab sticks? Perhaps.
Denim is a curate's egg of a fabric. Forgiving and punishing. But of course it's all related to how much you wash it. Of course. The answer is don't, as all fattening people know and anyway denim can absorb a large amount of dirt/baby food/dog slobber/wiped hands etc without notice. We all have several pairs of jeans: when I am a fat person jeans, when I am a thin person jeans, jeans we bought and seemed like a good idea at the time (especially red ones, otherwise known as when I am a twat jeans) and jeans we can always get on. I have two pairs of thin-person jeans. Zara and Diesel. Large is a post-modern word in clothes sizing. Mrs Zara and Mr Diesel both have exceptionally thin friends with very long legs. Spanish? Italian? Either way, mysteriously, they currently fit. I haven't tried them on for over a year. Perhaps some kind of damp moth has relaxed the fabric? Or age? Or perhaps I am a bit thinner? Mysterious. Yes. As I keep saying.
Vow to go back on the plan tomorrow (holiday is over), and weigh self in morning.
'The road to hell is paved with good intentions'. Thanks Edmund.
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CONGRATULATIONS on the Mysterious Loss. And pop over to the castle when you get a spare sec - there's a message for you there xxx
ReplyDeleteIf you can fit in Diesel jeans you are not fat! They are made for people with the a very low waist to groin measurement I find- I am long bodied and on me they are indecent- and very tight!!!
ReplyDeleteI do agree about the multiple pairs issue- I have very thin day ones, ones that look great if I stand up but I can't sit down all night in, ones I can only wear with boots. I end up wearing the same 2 pairs all the time though.
I am with Rose on Mr Diesel. It's been about a million years since I fitted into mine.
ReplyDeleteGreat blog, btw. You can pay Cassandra for sending over new fans.